Part 4: Permission To Be On a Journey by Rha Goddess
If you want the video of this, click here to watch Part 5: Permission To Be On a Journey
So far, we’ve talked about:
In Part 3, Permission To Pursue Your Conviction, we talked about pursuing your conviction. The closer we get to the release of my new book, the more I’m hearing this theme reverberating through our community. You get it. You feel it. You need this message. At the end of the year more than ever. So, let’s dive in.
First off, shout out to all of my SHE Summiters, my Spirit Junkies, my Medipreneuers, my Live Love Lead Mastermind Cohorts ONE and TWO… it’s been amazing to be with you ALL over the last couple of weeks. For the last almost four weeks I’ve been on the road. It’s been crazy and it’s wonderful to be back.
One of the conversations we were in was: why is this thing about permission? Why are you going so deep with permission?
I want to remind everyone about love’s third promise, our theme this year: You are worthy. We are practicing this in this quarter by taking bold and unapologetic action. This takes us to the next level of self-love, self-appreciation. This practice of taking one bold action a day is not to be played with. In this conversation about worthiness, it makes perfect sense to be talking about permission.
My Insider’s Club is going deeper around this too. It’s not too late to join that group, so click here to learn more about that.
Permission To Be On a Journey
So, I’ve been on the road for three and half weeks. Literally flew back on Thanksgiving. My agenda was packed: planes, trains, automobiles; stages, platforms, planners; online, live, big crowds little crowds and everything in between. About three quarters into it, I got really sick. I got really sick the night before a major keynote. Literally up until two hours before I was supposed to be on stage, I was curled up in a ball in the middle of the bed. Flat on my back. Totally out of it. Completely done.
If you know me, even a little bit, I don’t do sick. It ain’t my thing. It’s not a thing that I do. I do a significant amount of work to stay well. I believe the truth that I am well. My practices and rituals ensure that I stay well. I believe truth about my soul and my spirit and my physical form. So, me not being well = breakdown. Problem. Worse yet, I have never been flat on my back the day of a keynote. Up until hours before, questioning whether or not I was going to be able to take the stage. For me, that just doesn’t happen.
The deep part about this is what I was able, thank God, about two hours before to turn it around. Lots of prayer, lots of calling in of grace and calling in spirit. I was able to get up, get dressed, get to the venue, deliver, hold people and be connected. I delivered on the message and promise and then curled right back into bed. I came back here and starting to debrief this conversation with my coach yesterday.
I’m looking at my calendar and recognizing this ever-expanding reality and seeing: something has got to give. And that something is me. I want to talk about what I mean when I say this as I introduce this fourth permission. As I look at my calendar and I look at the growing obligations that are showing up on my plate, my temptation is either to:
Pull back (stop it all, cancel it all)
Lean in (force it, push through)
Those are the things that I know. I’m learned in. Those are the things that I have mastered in terms of habits and practices.
The question that I am being asked by spirit right now is “are you willing to do this differently?”
It’s the same question I got asked when I was in the middle of the bed, curled up in a ball. It wasn’t sheer force of will that got me up and got me able to take the stage and deliver. It was surrender. It was surrender. When I look back at it, there was a cue from the universe that said, “Rha. Rest.”
Been given a lot this week.
Been doing a lot this week.
Sit down and be still.
But Rha wouldn’t do it. Let me just get these one, two, three things in first. I can put on my lipstick and heels. I’m strong. I got this. I did not listen. And because I did not listen, I got put flat on my back. You listen or your forced to listen. Invest to rest.
As I am unpacking this, I realize that I’m being given this challenge NOW, because the demands are only going to grow. I’m in a reality right now where my world is expanding and the demands are only going to grow. If I can’t open myself up to doing this differently, I may be in some trouble. If left to my own devices, my contained amount of energy, I’ve got problems. The spirit lectured me up and down about protecting my energy, replenishing my energy, being a good steward of my energy.
I had lots of permission to beat myself up about this.
The only thing that is saving me right now is permission four. Permission four is Permission To Be On a Journey.
Jump-Start the Journey of This Permission
In the last part of this series, Calgary talked about her issues that hold her back from stepping into her calling. We worked in that space between seeing what we want, claiming what we want, owning what we want and taking the actions that are consistent with what we want. Moving from talking about it to actually engaging in the world.
This permission to be the journey is about being willing to not allow the pressure of expectations and perfection and somebody’s else’s opinion and how you think it should go to keep you stuck.
If you are currently feeling:
I want to invite you to breathe deeply with me as we go through this.
Permission to be on the journey is permission to be:
Not know it all
Be a beginner
This is permission to try, stumble, fall, to get back up again. Permission to fail. Permission to try. Permission to try again. Permission to try some more.
Permission to go from foggy to clear.
Permission to go from uncertain to certainty.
We have a problem with not looking good while we’re doing it.
I will tell you, I did not look good two weeks ago. Hot mess. As much as I could beat myself up about it, I had to respect that I’m trying to break forty some-odd years of habits.
If I don’t have an expectation that sometimes I’m going to get it wrong, then I’m not really giving myself permission to try.
Where Are You Willing to Grow?
Being in this permission to be on the journey, you are asking yourself: are you willing to grow? Where are you willing to grow?
Each of us have areas of our lives: our business, family, raising children, everybody has an edge. Every single one of us has an edge that wants to grow. For most of us, we’ve got edges. If we’re really engaged and on the court, every single facet of where we’re moving is inviting you to a new level of growth. When we ask this question, “WHERE are you willing to grow?” what I’m really asking you and what I’m wanting you to listen to is:
Can you allow yourself to be uncomfortable with the current state?
Can you embrace all of what is uncertain right now?
Are you willing to let go of controlling the process?
Are you willing to let go of controlling other people?
Are you willing to let go of controlling all of the forces that makes your desire come together?
Are you willing to dance with the mystery in the name of miracles and magic?
If you really want magic and miracles in your reality, you’ve got to let go of what you know. You’ve got to be willing to surrender to what you don’t know. You have to be willing to be uncomfortable.
Something new is coming through.
This is the end of an era.
I will say to you all, a lot of us think we’re winning with what we know, but it’s not reality and it’s not sustainable.
What It Means To Be On the Journey
This invitation to be on the journey is about the invitation to grow. It is about this invitation to do it differently, to invite something new, to be willing to move outside of our comfort zone and outside of our control zones.
Being on the journey is not about fixing or forcing, it’s about allowing yourself to be guided. Surrender. Maybe not my way. Maybe there’s another way. Maybe there’s something else here I need to learn, understand, embrace or work through.
Real talk: these are identity crises. If you’ve “mastered” a certain way of operating, it’s hard for you to come out of the box.
Part 4 Permission To Be On a Journey Homework
Think about this:
Pick one area where you feel stress, anxiety or an emotional charge.
Home, work, relationship, health and well-being, wherever you want to go.
Presence that area. Close your eyes. Breathe with that area.
What is the conversation that you’ve been having with yourself around that area?
I want you to notice the feelings.
I want you to observe the thoughts.
Ask yourself: where am I being invited to grow right now?
Ask yourself: where am I being invited to let go right now?
Where am I being invited to give myself some room right now?
Where am I being invited to welcome in something new and unknown right now?
Jot down a couple of notes about what you’re starting to hear.
Can you honor the wisdom of what you’re starting to hear?
Permission Four Questions
Are you willing to give yourself permission to try?
Are you willing to give yourself permission to explore?
Are you willing to give yourself permission to look silly?
Are you willing to give yourself permission to not know?
Are you willing to give yourself permission to be a work in progress?
Permission Four Core Ideas and Reflections
You are a work in progress.
You are a divine, magnificent work in progress.
But a work in progress nonetheless.
This permission is about being willing to honor the power of where you are.
Honor where you are, especially in relationship to where you want to be.
This is about allowing:
To help you close the gap between where you are and where you want to be.
This is the permission to change your mind.
This is the permission to change your direction.
This is the permission to shift your perspective.
This permission is the room you allow yourself to truly evolve and grow.
Once you get where you think you need to go, the next opportunity will come. Life is designed to grow you. Your soul wants nothing more than to evolve. It’s going to keep bringing you opportunities and challenges so that you will lean in. This idea of giving yourself permission to be a journey is really saying, I give myself permission to be alive.
The growing edge conversation about ripe and ready is all about not trying to force change. The conversation is a respect for nature and the evolutionary, organic process that is always operating on your behalf. Your work is to stand on the edge. It you are behind the edge, you’re bored and playing small. If you’re over the edge, you are stretched and reaching and overwhelmed. On your edge is that sweet spot where it’s just the right stretch in just the right places and you have the capacity to meet that stretch and the reaching for it actually excites and enlivens you.
How you get there, how it looks, the timeline: those are the things that you get to let go of and surrender because those are the things that you cannot control.
Our willingness to be on the journey is all about being willing to surrender and work in a new way and live in a new way.
Give yourself permission to let go.
Give yourself permission to take the next step.
Give yourself this permission over and over and over again.
This becomes the practice.